That's over with then. Needing something to sustain me (aka stop me from falling asleep during the less riveting longueurs of The Open) I popped into Second Citizen Mark II on Friday and pointed out that a flakey tart called Elora Lunasea's self-deceptive comment that she was "overweight for her height" would mean that, at 200lbs, the standard BMI formula would suggest that she would be a pro basketball player at approaching eight feet. The reality is more like this.
The subsection of The Ladies Who Lunch (that would be The Ladies Who Lunch Too Much) stormed out of their charity committee meetings in her defence, and Luc, their sole working mod, despite stating publicly that I had not broken any rules, was prevailed upon by an anonymous pressure group (which probably included Jen the cowardly counsellor, and Viv the Invisible, as well as Ishina, who rivals Scylla in her righteous anger, but is an intellectually defective Mancunian incapable of writing two consecutive sentences without contradicting herself) to reverse the arbitrarily imposed borking (which facility, to the ex-Fox's presumed dismay, was as a direct consequence removed from the admin's powers) which I guess Monna The Well-Balanced (chips on both shoulders) had asked for to make my posts appear like hers on a good day, and to consign me to The Cornfield. Unfortunately my mate Jumpy is no longer an inhabitant there, having been banned after picking up (during our previous mutual infestation) on the fact that it is the best place to be in SC2, as the mountain comes to Mohammed (about 90% of the posts over the weekend were made there) and you don't have to scout around the boring deserted outskirts of the forum looking for targets. Lee had pre-emptively picked out a good spot (justifiably according to Willow - an "educated" Australian, which presumably means she has a PhD in joined-up writing) there as well, and with her well-timed hagiographic blog post (if I may immodestly point out) garnering more comments than the Forum Confidential over the course of the weekend, there was plenty of material for all parties to get their teeth into.
Good old Darren won the golf at a canter in the end, and the SC2 contingent were getting extremely unoriginal in their repetitive attempts at insult (CaTo showed them a couple of examples of how to do it well, but they were unappreciative) so I have left them to it, until the next time. Next time the ennui threatens to overwhelm me perhaps I will disinter an alt and poke a stick into the anthill that is the official SL forum. Until then, if anything out of the ordinary strikes me I'll post it here.
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It was a refreshing respite Pep, as we were not subjected to an inundation of half-wit lolcats and Tubes, as you know they are not allowed in the Corn, which may explain the denizens of SC II becoming flummoxed and apathetic.
ReplyDeleteI have always preferred The Open to the other majors (possibly with the exception of The Masters) as it always becomes a humbling experience for many of the top names in the world. Some of the post shot quizzical looks and laughs are priceless.
All in all an entertaining weekend.
I couldn't help reading it all while listening to AC/DC's "Whole lotta Rosie" ... :)
ReplyDeleteI missed all the fun, however, Darren turned in a great performance.
ReplyDeleteSo did you.
The Cornfield suits me just fine - you are forced to use words to express yourself, which does, however, create a problem for those who have a vocabulary seemingly limited to four letter words (who repeat themselves on a fast spin-cycle) or who have problems remembering at the end of a sentence what they intended to say at the start of it.
ReplyDeleteI like the cornfield, specially because indeed LOLcats are not allowed..hehe. It's a nice playground for a dull weekend :).
ReplyDeleteThanks for the fun, guys !
Lee is providing a public service (as I told her on her blog) by giving us the wheat without a lot of the chaff. Ahhhh and now here you are with a real blog post of your own. I feel positively woozy (of course that has nothing to do with blog posts but is fun to write). :)
ReplyDeleteOh my, the attention whore in you must be positively giddy! Whole threads dedicated to your posts! The method pays off! Which is better, the attention or the picture of Cary Grant being likened to you? Ppppththth, Cary Grant, as if! He wasn't half as handsome and as debonair as the Pepster!
(tone... ?)(mwah!)
Oh dear... you can pick on any minority group in SL, but the one thing you can't do is poke the weight benders. No, not because they might bite your finger off or because your hand could get stuck between the rolls and layers. Simply because they're not a minority group. There is a reason that the most popular option in all SL related polls is "pie".
ReplyDeletePS: "The Ladies Who Lunch Too Much" was funny, but pretty mean. How about The Ladies Who Suffer from Glandular Problems? Surely gorging on bucketloads of chicken wings and considering bimonthly yoga lessons to be sufficient exercise has nothing to do with their weight problem. Correlation does not imply causation. It's always the glands, and it is horribly cruel and mean-spirited to suggest dietary causes.
@L: Cary Grant? I'm the pilot of the plane strafing the innocent!
ReplyDeletePep (And before you ask, it's me behind David Niven)
Pep is right on both counts. Finally someone got it!
ReplyDeleteLee (And people wonder why I have some appreciation for the attention whore.)
I did, however, say on my site that one of the things I enjoy is posting something that can have multiple interpretations, like those two pictures, and then seeing what people do with them. Being the culture geek I am ( of course you could also blame it on my education in critical literature theory which comes complete with multiple schools of interpretation), I tend to hope people will pick it up and riff with it, ya know, like something with the famous "shortcomings" line. Or the Cary Grant line, "Everyone wants to be Cary Grant. Even I want to be Cary Grant." Perfect for the Pep persona.
ReplyDeleteI thought "Loud Mouthed Manc Twat" was my best contribution. ;)
ReplyDeleteIt was probably the only part of your posts she actually understood. It's fairly obvious she's a "visuals" person (like Sus) and not very comfortable with being forced to use *words* in the Cornfield.
ReplyDelete